Y ; Wednesday, June 13, 2007.
The coming months has taught me many things about friends.......they never last how close they might get they never last.....thats what i was told before but i never believed it till now.....betrayal never seems near until it comes......i trusted so many people and they all let me down one way or another! I taught i should forget the betrayals that came to me in primary school life and trust my friends here more but we can't compromise to anything...we seem to be against each other....watever you suffered i suffered tooo.....i sometimes felt thati had to scream at you to let me have my say when you would go on and on about yourself!........i dunno....i loved your company and the way it was between us watever you do i alwaystold myself i had to give in sometimes but we were way out
There was something you weren't telling me i could sense it.....you wouldn't tell me.....i asked you over again because i cared and didn't want anything to spoil our relationship....but it was over we both knew it.... we were too far apart i knew it you knew it everyone around us knew it.....but some people were blocking our way.....making it hard too move.....they were idiots to interfere.....they knew it yet they wanted to be part of it......
They talked to me about it, i needed someone to talk tooo to spill out all my worried to leave myself...the part that wanted to be with you most behind so that i could carry on life again........but it was hard i knew it she knew it they all knew it ....they did nothing but stood behind the glass wall that seperated me from you....i was depressed with me with you...everything.....the only thing that gave me comfort would me family and cousins..nothing else felt good.....i longed to be at home ...near my CCA.....i wanted to be as far as possible from you
But we both know its going to be hard as we stuck to each other like glue although it was long ago and far from us.....i still know part of me still wants to be near you.......away from a close friend was so difficult.....hey i know i avoided a friend for 1.5 year but i had to talk to you to let you know i still am there to be as close as we were...to tell you nothing could tear us apart i don't understand why.......sigh.....although you still pour to me everything...its just not the same....
You need someone so do I.......but i know you won't be there when i need you.....or willl you........im not the same...different in character and different by heart.......i'm different i learnt my lesson ill never be close to anyone but my family and cousins because i know i can't rely on friends the term given to people who dont stay long.....sigh thankz for reading this blog entry i wrote this because i know i wanted her to know!!!.....im not me no longer you can forget the other part im different